in january, i told myself i would shift my focus to finishing one of my novels this year. i tend to jump into multiple projects, flash fiction writing circles, writing workshops, editing and mailing off submissions to publications, and more of the like, to the detriment of any time spent staring at the crude materials that make up my larger work.
what doesn't help me is the fact that i've never written a complete novel before, and have only the foggiest notion of how to edit the thing. i seem to lose my direction when faced with such a huge undertaking.
so, it's february. and i'm still involved with my workshop and my weekly circle, and i've added onto that revisions i've been doing to a story that'll see publication next month. (woohoo!!--and the revising is going along swimmingly, thanks.) these are all worthwhile pursuits. nothing to be hand-wringy about.
but it's not focusing on the novel now, is it?
how do i accept deep in my squishy soul that this thing won't write itself? and how do i get to the mindspace where i'm truly ready to wade in with both feet, get those ankles wet and freaking stay wet, and fulfill my destiny? hm. maybe that begs the question: what if my destiny isn't writing novels? or worse. what if my destiny isn't . . . *gasp* . . . writing at all?
is being a hobby writer enough for me? answers to these questions and more next time.
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Interesting questions, and ones I'm sure most of us have thought. At least I have! However, I refuse to believe that this isn't my destiny. Destiny is what we make it...or at least we can make our own destiny until something else hits us like a Mac truck. Don't give up on it. I would say to start with something small--technical bits or something. Or, read through the whole thing, pen in hand. As you read, write down whatever thoughts you are having on it at the moment.
ReplyDeleteI am trying to work on this time management thing, myself!
I forgot to add something--how long ago since you really started trying to work as an author? Like really, truly started putting out the effort? Last year? And look--I see three stories listed as published over there in your info bar. That is nothing to sneeze at, lady. :)
ReplyDeleteokay, you have officially boosted me back into the writer's seat. thanks for the hand up, d. i've even fastened my lap belt. :D
ReplyDeleteone thing that gives me continual hope is my tendency toward renewed enthusiasm for this writing life--as frustrated as i get with myself, i never get tired of the actual writing. that's gotta be a sign, right?