writing versus rewriting

i'm working on editing and rewriting chunks of a story this week. i'm to send it off to my editor/publisher friend this weekend, integrating various suggestions and brainstorms we came up with last conversation. i've never written to a specific goal before.

starting a new story is exhilarating, freeing, godlike in its power. we create something from the wispy synapses firing away in our brains, and if all goes well, that something we create comes out as something wonderful and infects whoever reads it with more wonderful. of course, our creations aren't always fabulous, and what we infect readers with sometimes is closer to bacteria than cotton candy love and puppy dander socks.

so, here i am, editing. reworking. my stories are almost all first drafts, dropping onto the page still sealed inside their placental sac, smelling of earthy life and promise, and now, i'm breaking the seal, splitting the membrane. i'm risking infection for the greater promise of growth.

i'm hoping this new effort results in an even stronger story, deeper and complex, and so far have ignored that niggling voice in the back of my throat warning me i may be killing it altogether. after all, i'll always have the first draft. right? i don't think this story is changed irrevocably, or that adding new scenes, developing side characters, further defining the protagonist will erase the earlier incarnation. i don't think it will.

if you're interested in reading this story when it's finished, visit www.ruthlesspeoples.com and subscribe to the publication. first issue is march 1st!!